Memory is a bad thing. Its the villain of our life 😉 , whenever we try to start something fresh it comes suddenly “Dhan te nan, te ne ne na….Dhan te nan, te ne ne na…Dhan te nan, te ne ne na…” and reminds us of past failures. Most of the times, we just brush aside that “Dhan te nan, te ne ne na” reminder of our memory and we proceed ahead. However, sometimes we get into the trap of ‘memory’ and struggle to get out of it.
Past two days were such crazy days of mine. When I get into such mood I go into silent mode. Donot mistake my “Silent Mode” to complete silence !!!!! No way!!! Silent Mode means controlled talk time. In this silent mode, I behave like a typical text bookish gooody Indian girl. I talk very softly, very slowly, very obediently , very limitedly on limited issues unlike my usual talks which go on for ages on any topic, I smile unlike my usual loud laughter. Silent Mode is the only time when I am complete terms with my mother, I agree to whatever she says…by saying “Ok Amma! Yes Amma!” unlike usual times. My mother too does not enjoy my silent mode for much hours 😉 . I sing all types of bollywood , tollywood songs which makes one cry cry cry….songs in my silent mode include “Kal Ho Na Ho….Jag Soona Soona…Jagamanta Kutumbam naadi….” . I don’t sing these songs completely I restrict my selves only to first stanza as I am not that good at memorizing song lyrics.
This time, I tried to get out of my silent mode by reading lot of inspirational stuff from the books, blog posts of friends, heard lot of music, had talks with parents, brothers, nephews and friends. I did all the things possible…meanwhile my colleagues wondered about the reason for my silent mode attitude . Some one asked me secretly “Hey! Did you scold anyone? ” (knowing my nature….I don’t get scolded in general..it happens the other way…). Some were secretly enjoying my “Silent Mode”…they were happy that they got Vimukti/salvation from my talks. However, I know that I am God’s own unique creation. I am back to my normal mode again today, silent mode is just a temporary mode ….
Mean while in the past two days I explored different poems and liked this poem the best. Do check it and read it to get inspired during your silent mode days.
Good Morning God by Helen Steiner Rice
You are ushering in another day
untouched and freshly new,
so here I come to ask You God if
You’ll renew me too?
Forgive the many errors that
I made yesterday,
and let me try again dear God,
to walk closer in Thy way.
But Father, I am well aware
I can’ t make it on my own.
So take my hand and hold it tight
for I can’t walk alone.